November Tips and Tricks

It’s been awhile since I posted a “Tips and Tricks” article so here’s some new things to try out for this month.

1. If your cuticles are constantly dry, especially since the weather is getting cooler, or if you have a tendency to get hangnails and you can’t go get a manicure as often as you want, a pair of cotton gloves and cuticle oil will help you out. You can get a pair at the drug store and apply some cuticle oil to your nails and around them and up your fingers. (I use citrus scented with real flowers inside.) When you’re finished, put on your gloves and let the oil soak into your nails and skin for atleast an hour. Your skin and cuticles will feel so much better after. 

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2. If you get headaches a lot or have a massive migraine but don’t want to take a lot of medicine, apply a tiny bit of peppermint oil to your temples and a drop on your forehead. Massage oil gently into your skin. In a couple of minutes, the oil and it’s aromatic healing properties will help that head pain disappear. 

3. Here’s another essential oil tip. I love using essential oils for both their magical and healing properties. If you’re feeling stressed or anxious, take a few drops of lavender oil and apply a drop to both of their wrists. Also place a drop on your chest. Massage in. Lavender provides, peace and calmness . Just breathe in the delicious fragrance and it will help calm you down. 

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4. If you want to wear highlighter but don’t want to spend money on a highlighter pan because you don’t know if you’ll like it or just don’t want to spend extra cash on one, using eyeshadow that is a shimmer will give your face and specifically your cheek bones a lovely glow. Some good shadows that I like to play around with include Sugarpill’s “Wink” and Storybook Cosmetics Wizard and Wizardry, “Jinx” and “Bewitched.” Pressed shimmer shadows work best. If you want a more intense highlight, a pressed glitter shadow will let you achieve that look. 

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5. This is probably the most important and helpful tip and trick on here!

If you find yourself really hot and sweating a lot, pouring a little ice cold water on your wrist will cool down the blood and stop your sweating and hot flashes. An ice cube will do the same thing. This trick also works if you’re having an ANXIETY or PANIC attack. The coldness will help STOP them dead in their tracks.

Hope these tips and tricks help you out or just make your life a little easier.

Sending love to you all. 💝🍒

 

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Sunday Morning Coffee Chat: “How to Develop True Friendships and to Have/Keep True Friends.”

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I’ve been thinking about friendships lately and over the years since I was little, I made friends, had best friends, lost friendships like everyone does. I even ended two long term friendships with ladies who I thought we’d be best friends forever, one was my best friend (We’ll call her B) of almost twenty years, and my other so-called best friend (We’ll call her A) of almost eighteen years. There are good reasons why I couldn’t give my energy to them or be friends with them which I will discuss below.

In our lives, friends come and go of course and we always learn something from them, whether it’s what we don’t want in a friendship, or that putting all your loving energy into someone who doesn’t appreciate and/or reciprocate isn’t worth it. If you’re looking for a true friendship, or want to make sure a particular friend of yours is a “True Friend,” here are some tips and advice that may help. I’m speaking from experience. **On a side note some people like to have A LOT of friends or so called friends around them so they can feel good or popular, which is nothing wrong with that. Me personally, (again after trial and error friendships,) I’d rather have a small group of close and TRUE and LOVING friends than a huge group of FAIR WEATHER friends.

1.    Is is a 50/50 friendship?

I’ve had friends where I have always have been truly supportive in their times of need whether it be me grieving with them, listening to their problems, hearing the issues of their love life, etc., and when I try to get some support or advice from them, they are either too busy to talk on the phone or whatever, or they’re so self-involved that they don’t hear me or care. I don’t go for that. A true friend always makes time for you and communicates. Even if they can’t talk at the moment, a true friend will call or text you when they can. A true friendship is not one-sided.

2. Are you ALWAYS the one to call first and make plans?

This annoys me so much. With a lot of my so-called friends, (otherwise known as acquaintances,) and past friends I’m always the one calling to make plans, even if it’s just a dinner date or to come over for a drink, etc. That’s not cool. I’ve come to the point where for my own mental state, I can’t always be the one to initiate spending time with someone. My time is just as valuable as the other person and it is so extremely rude when people don’t respect your time.

3. In times of need, are they there for you?

This is probably the most important thing of a true friendship. Is your friend there for you in serious times of need, whether it’s a death in the family, a breakup, dealing with depression, anything. True friends should always be there for each other.

4. Can they peel themselves away from their significant partner to spend one on one quality time with you?

In my twenties, I dropped a girlfriend, (the one who I had been friends with for almost eighteen years because she could not peel her self away from her boyfriend. It was ridiculous. If I wanted to have “Girl Time,” with my friend, I wasn’t allowed because he had to be there. I don’t know who’s insecurity it was, his or hers, but it pissed me off and told my friend that and that I wanted to talk about personal issues with her that I didn’t want her new boyfriend to know, and that was the last time she spoke to me. What a great friend huh? To be fair, she treats her mother like garbage and always has since I’ve known her so I should’ve expected similar treatment.

I know this was a long Sunday Coffee Chat but I thought this was a good topic and can possibly help you determine who your close and true friends are. I am very selective with the special people I allow in my friendship circle and because of that, I HAVE SOME EXTREMELY WONDERFUL SPECIAL BEST FRIENDS THAT I CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON AND WHO CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON ME. I’VE FEATURED SOME OF THEM ON MY SITE HERE IN THE PAST AS WELL.

What are your friendships like? Do you have any stories you want to share? You know I always love to hear from you guys. Just leave them in the comment section as usual. Thank you for reading another edition of Sunday Coffee Chat and a HUGE SPECIAL THANK YOU TO MY VERY WONDERFUL TRUE FRIENDS! YOU KNOW WHO YOU BEAUTIFUL SOULS ARE. WINK WINK!

An extra special thanks to my long time sister Monica Martinez for always being there for me and never judging me through all the crazy crap her and I have both been through. I’ve known her for almost ten years.

Rest in Peace Dolores Chapman

This morning I woke up early to some absolutely devastating news. Dolores Chapman aka TipToeChick had passed away only a few days ago before Samhain which is the Witch’s New Year. She was only thirty-eight years old. I was in floods of tears when I heard this news. We are in the same community for Wicca and whenever I had spoken to her online, she was always so sweet and kind. She used the name TipToeChick for her youtube channel which is one of my all time favorite channels. I’ll be posting her channel information down below.

Besides all the videos she did on Wicca and spirituality, she also posted videos about her online business which was the “Green Eyed Owl”, healthy recipes, her wonderful family, and more. She did not make one video that I didn’t enjoy. The best thing about Dolores is that when you watch her videos, you don’t actually feel like you’re watching a regular youtube video. You feel like you were just having a conversation with a best friend. Even if you don’t practice Wicca, I still recommend checking out her channel. She had such a beautiful soul and very special energy which will live on.

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   Her best friend and another member of our community, “CharmingPixieFlora” posted a very good but very emotional video talking about TipToeChick as well as how to deal with grieving in general. It’s really a great video that I know came from her heart. I posted it below and I DEFINITELY think everyone should watch it.

   I’ve been sending prayers to her family and will be lighting candles in her honor. I know her spirit and soul is still with us  and watching over her family and friends. I love you Dolores. You will be missed TipToeChick. Blessed Be!

 

 

 

 

Sunday Morning Coffee Chat: “Privacy and Pressuring People”

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Morning everyone. Here’s another edition of  “Sunday Morning Coffee Chat.” Today’s topic is on privacy. I’ve noticed that people have a big issue with privacy, whether it’s feeling that they’re too private and don’t share enough or that they don’t keep anything private in their lives, or that others make them feel bad about being too private and not opening up, etc. This is how I feel about that. Being private is never a bad thing. What I think lands in a gray area sometimes is the difference between being private or not being private enough VERSUS people getting frustrated with the people they love and care about because they “SHUT DOWN”  and never really open up and share important issues in their lives. That’s not the focus of today’s article but I know I will discuss more about “shutting down” and the “Gray area” in the future., (maybe next post.)

Today I wanted to talk about privacy in the sense of how people can sometimes expect and pressure you to tell your whole life story a few seconds after you first meet them. I really hate when people overstep their boundaries and try to insert themselves in other people’s business or situations that they don’t know anything about. That probably annoys me the most. 

I consider myself a somewhat private person. Yes I’m on social media and I have a few sites including a youtube channel, but the main reason I have all that is to promote myself and my work. I don’t use every social media service either. I only have Instagram, which is what I use the most, Facebook, and twitter which I don’t use as much anymore, With that said, I never really post photos of my family except for my husband but even with him, I pick and choose which pictures to post so he is comfortable, especially since he doesn’t use social media as much as I do. Even though I’m private and very selective about posting things about my family, I don’t clock my friends or anyone who are proud and want to show pictures of their loved ones.  It’s everyone’s own personal choice. For me personally, especially since we live in an era of social media, I enjoy having some mystery in my life.

Now when it comes to meeting a new person and wanting to get to know them better, or even if you know the person already, you can’t force them to open up to you if they don’t want to. If you keep pressuring them, it usually makes them retreat and do the opposite, at least that’s what happens with me. If someone is teasing or bothering me to talk, I usually end up keeping my mouth shut and ignoring their request. You shouldn’t ever feel bad or weird if you don’t want to share certain things with others. You keep whatever you want in your life private and don’t ever feel guilty about that.

I have a HUGE PROBLEM with people overstepping their bounds. I’ve had that happen to me which I talked about in my last Sunday/Wednesday Coffee Chat post which was called, “Don’t Involve Yourself in My Family.” I don’t appreciate when people try to “Catch Me” in something to make themselves look better and/or to prove me wrong. When people have tried to confront me about something specific they think I may have said or done, not being open with them, or being overly private, I just think to myself as well as saying out loud, “Yeah and what’s your point?” or “It’s None of Your Business.” I get really upset and pissed off when people interfere in other people’s lives when it’s not out of concern. If you’re truly concerned about someone because of a situation that is unhealthy or possibly dangerous, that’s completely different. I have an issue when people interfere just to create drama, especially when it involves me and especially when it’s someone who I thought I could trust and count on to support me and to not interfere where they don’t belong.

To finish this off, my advice to anyone who deals with people getting overly involved in their private life, is to not post things online that you don’t want to have to explain, tell people to mind their own business if you know their intentions aren’t pure, and to always have confidence in yourself and to trust your instincts, especially when deciding what to keep private in your life. And I will say this one more time. Don’t ever let anyone make you feel guilty for keeping some things private in your life. It’s your prerogative.

   Thank you for spending another Sunday morning having a quick discussion with me. I appreciate you all and see you very soon. Happy Sunday!

Sunday Morning Coffee Chat, “Age-Shaming and Dealing with Negativity during PhotoShoots”

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Good morning everyone. Happy Sunday and here’s another edition of Sunday morning coffee chat. As I’ve said in past Sunday posts, this is about talking and/or expressing my views and opinions on issues and topics that I normally don’t talk about on my site here. Because I missed last Sunday, today is a two for one post.

Topic number One: Age Shaming

A big pet peeve of mine is when people think I don’t know what I’m talking about, or that I am dumb, or inexperienced just because I’m younger then them. I especially used to get this a lot when I was in my early twenties but the truth was that the majority of my friends were older than me and would forget my age because we had the same maturity level. I really hate when people, especially when I have to work with them on a shoot or a show, are condescending or try to shove their age, experience, and so-called professionalism in my face. After having a bunch of so-called friends in my life that I stopped being friends with because of the way they treated me or took advantage of my friendship, I’m VERY GOOD at reading people and the impressions they give off.

Concerning being on shoots or behind the scenes of a performance, I’ve encountered a few people that have treated me like a brand new model or performer who they think can boss me around or treat me poorly. That EXTREMELY bothers me because they don’t know what I’ve done and for how long, my experiences I’ve had, and all the things I’ve been through. I DON’T PUT UP WITH THAT SHIT AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU!!! No shoot or job is worth it if it’s going to upset you or bring down your self-esteem. ALWAYS BE CONFIDENT IN YOURSELF AND YOUR SKILLS AND TALENT. ALSO STAND UP TO ANYONE WHO IS MAKING YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT YOURSELF WHETHER IT’S YOUR AGE OR ANYTHING. WHAT’S THE WORSE THAT CAN HAPPEN IF YOU STAND UP FOR YOURSELF? When you do stand up for yourself, you don’t need to cuss at the person who’s upsetting you. I know it’s hard and I’ve had to control myself going completely off before. (I admit that sometimes I fail at that.) Instead be extra polite when confronting the person and show how confident you are when you speak because you know what you’re talking about and the person will pick up on your confidence and most likely won’t be rude or treat your poorly again.

Just because I may be younger than you, doesn’t mean you know what I’ve been though in my life. I can get very angry when people say things like that to me. If I know the person and it’s in a playful manner then I’m not bothered. If I know the intention is vindictive, then I’ll most likely tell them that it’s none of their business or to “shut the fuck up.” I can honestly say that I’ve never age-shamed someone for being too young or too old.

 Topic Two: More About Dealing with negativity or drama during photoshoots:

I wanted to talk about this specifically as advice for new models or for people, especially girls who are interested in getting into modeling. I’m speaking from personal experience about a scenario that happened to me a few months back. Another HUGE PET PEEVE OF MINE is when the person in charge of the shoot, whether if it’s a group or individual shoot, tells me that they “Always protect their girls and their model’s safety and comfort level, and to tell them if you are having an issue with anyone on set,” and then when you do tell them a concern or a harassing issue that happened between you and a certain photographer or another person on set, that same person who preaches about keeping their girl’s safe and sticking up for them, goes to that photographer and tells them what you said about them and then takes the side of the them instead of yours.

   And to top it off, that photographer that was making others uncomfortable, angry, and who had been rude confronts you through messaging for voicing your concerns to the person in charge of the shoot. I had that happen to me and I didn’t even say anything about them. I was actually with another model and another photographer that told the person in charge how aggressive and rude this certain photographer was behaving and I just agreed with them. And then the rude photographer who didn’t even give me any of the photos he shot of me because he tried to get money from me, messages me and confronts only me about talking about him. I was the only one he confronted which pissed me off because I wasn’t the person who really said anything and the person in charge “stirred the pot” and told him what was said and through me “under the bus” for no reason. And even when I told them that he was messaging me which was extremely unprofessional and weird and even showed screenshots to show that I wasn’t exaggerating, she still took his side. And then when I asked him a simple question about my photos he had shot of me, he tried to tell me that the group shoot was a TFP shoot which means trade for prints or trade for photos. I told him I knew what it meant and that I had been modeling for awhile. And if it was a TRADE shoot, why did he try to charge me or even take pictures of me if he knew he wasn’t going to give me any of my images?

I was so angry as well as my husband who is also a photographer as well as friends of mine who’ve worked with me many times. My husband almost was ready to get involved with the situation. I was upset because not only did I get confronted by a condescending ass of a photographer but I lost all respect and trust for the person who put the shoot together. The whole situation was so unprofessional and bizarre. I don’t mind sharing this experience because it may help other models be aware of what can happen on a shoot behind the scenes and will know what to do if a similar situation happens to them. No shoot is worth you feeling that way. If you’re a new model or have an interest in modeling be sure to not let anyone treat you that way no matter what and to again always have confidence in yourself.

Thank you for reading this and for your support. Be sure to leave your comments and opinions below and to subscribe to my site if you haven’t already.

10 Looks For Summer: Outfit Eight: “Vintage Rock and Roll Music Tops”

Ok you all know that I LOVE MUSIC, especially Rock and Roll and collect concert tees, vintage concert tees from my favorite bands, and even new modern music tees that you can just buy in regular stores. If you’ve been following my site here for a while, you might remember a DIY post I wrote a few years ago titled, “Getting Creative with Concert T-Shirts,” where I show you had to transform your concert tees into different rent looks by cutting them, tying them, taking extra large shirts and turning them into dresses, and more. Here’s the link below in case you haven’t seen it.  

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In this summer inspired look, I took one of my music shirts and instead of pairing it with a pair of jeans or shorts, I dressed it up a bit to show that you can dress up and casual top, especially if it’s a rock and roll/music top. Here I show my favorite Beatles top and paired it with a classic blazer since the weather is starting to finally get a little cooler, slowly but I’ll take it. I paired my cool “The Beatles” top, which is my all time favorite band by the way, with my silver silk pants. I love these pants because you can wear them long or pull them up a little bit so they have a more Capri silhouette In these photos I pulled them up to show of my gold spiked ankle boots with my seven inch gold heels. I love these and who says you can’t pair gold and silver together? I topped my look with my black sequined scarf around my neck that my husband bought me on our very first vacation we took together to New York after dating a year.

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Hope you enjoy my eighth summer inspired look. Only two more to go. Thank you everyone and have a great day.

 

Sunday/Thursday Morning Coffee Chat, “Giving Zero F*cks”

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I know I was supposed to post this topic this past Sunday but for personal reasons I couldn’t, so I’m making it up this morning with my cold Frappachino bottle and talking about “giving zero fucks.” 

I chose this topic because when I was younger, I definitely cared about what certain people and friends thought of me. By the time I reached my early 20’s I started caring less and less what anyone thought of me or if they disagreed with my opinions. I could’ve cared less. Unless it was my hubby’s opinion, haha. Wink wink!

   During those college years, I started realizing that after highschool, it’s not a popularity contest and no one gives a fuck how cool you were in highschool! 

I actually have a tattoo, my first word one, that says, “This is Life, not Heaven,  you don’t have to be Perfect!,” which is what I live by.  As long as my family and loved ones are happy, I’m happy!

My biggest advice to especially younger people or to anyone is to not care what anyone thinks about you.  Here’s a good book that I just got and already love that I recommend checking out.

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   Hope this little advice helps!!!! Lots of love!!!!!